** IF YOUR CHILD IS NOT A GENIUS, REJOICE ** It is well known how the high scores in the IQ test usually implies a superior verbal ability above other people. Nowadays, this sort of well-gifted people aren't very common. However, it is also true that those getting high marks in questionnaires, could even get to fail to build furniture from IKEA. So, Should they be deemed as gifted, or intelligent instead?. Firstly, when it comes to read newspapers, I usually feel the irrepressible desire of putting them to the test to unveil their utterly superior intelligence at early ages. Objectively, I challenge them to write long texts as a sign of validation of their highly creative imagination, without realising I am pushing them to fulfil tricky goals. Obviously, under such a high pressure, they are bound to lack persuasiveness, empathy, resilience or social charm. In addition to that, if I were one of those well-off parents, I would also boast about sending my children to the very best school I could afford, dazzling my friends and triggering an exhilarating ego trip in me. However, on second thought, my kids could be mummy and daddy deprived, as I would be supposed to work really hard around the clock to pay for school fees. Apart from that, I may lose insight about the fact that my kids would be raised by nannies. Having said that, there seems to be no point in publicly unearthing the alleged greatness in my children's brains. I mean, it is worth to wonder whether they are really average bystanders, eager to scream the Sponge Bob Square Pants' catchy refrain, rather than recite flawlessly the whole alphabet or count to twenty. Therefore, it would be better off choosing a slightly worse school and be much better parents. For example, take out the mickey and teach them to enjoy with everyday adventures. To conclude, accept your offsprings as they are, without caring about what they are expected to achieve, read comics with them and play games, no matter whether they are late to read or to do their shoelaces, what, depicts the cornerstone of their future happiness.
** WHY DO I FEEL SO DIFFERENT? ** Since I was a child, I have always had the nagging sense of being quite different to other people, a bit weird. For instance, I didn't fit well in school because I used to think far more deeply about issues, than other pupils, seeking answers about why things happened. Furthermore, I hardly ever have accepted criticism from others, due to my natural competitiveness. When it comes to quick shows, I have always been rather fast, answering tough questions, than those ones playing at the show. Nevertheless, I have never stopped to wonder why that happens. What is more, I have never cared about it. One morning, I started reading a gripping book entitled: “Diagnosis for your son's ailments: adolescence”. As I was reading, I couldn't believe my eyes. My behaviour was mirroring in those pages. I had definitely found a label that closely fits me: I am a gifted guy!. According to the author, my underachievement stemmed from my compulsive obsession for being overwhelmingly perfectionist when I´m doing things. Moreover, I had high capacity for doing many tasks at the same time, along with an irrepressible laziness when I was about to work, maybe due to the lack of challenging and interesting works to face to, at school. Doubtlessly, I had found the reason for my awkward conduct. To my relief, I am not an alien. I am just an extremely intelligent guy who has always gone simply undercover. I mean, I have always let my abilities go to a grass root level to disguise my giftedness, so as to be accepted in society. I have also tried to avoid being regarded as a hermit by my counterparts, suffering jokes gladly, without appearing too much touchy. Having said that, I don't want you to take things the wrong way, I am not drawing a bleak portrait of my childhood. No way. On the contrary, I'm merely telling you how I have felt along my life. However, and to conclude, it is worth to wonder why it is so difficult, for authorities, to discover gifted children and attend them in a different way, educationally speaking, before they to shut down. I mean, a way that doesn't leave so many psychological scars on them, preventing them from having to play a role of someone who they have never been.
Have you ever read in the paper or heard on the news something like this? "We got married and my daughter was born. She was breathtakingly beautiful. We felt exhilarated, absolutely delighted. After four years, my son arrived. Seemingly, everything was perfect... life was a dream....but...something made us wake up. What was happening? My son seemed to have special abilities, such as music, maths, computers and stuff like that. Actually, he was really good at music. He was able to hum music before starting to talk, when he was a baby. Moreover, he had a good head for figures. He was capable to do complex calculations at the age of 4. We suspected that he was exceptionally gifted. First, I was very proud of him and I thought that he would make a difference in our lives, but, in short, we realized that it could become a serious problem. In fact, the most rewarding experience turned out the be our worst nightmare. He started to be very competitive. He was really keen on maths and geometry. He used to do complex calculations all the time, and, when he was 6, he would spend long hours developing their activities and, as consequence, it triggered an obsession. He started to act improperly. It was difficult to keep up with the others at school. In addition, he was obsessed with taking part in competitions and events, which was very expensive. It was having an effect on the development. To make things worse, he ended up missing his friends. I was really worried, since a lack of social bonds is unhealthy".
First and foremost, realizing that your child seems to be a genius makes you feel overwhelmed, unable to react. Parents feel absolutely desperate. Some of them come close to having a nervous breakdown. Unexpectedly, the world falls apart. Your dreams disappear. You used to show off to your colleagues and friends that your child had special abilities, but now, you do not know whether you feel proud of him or not. Accepting your exceptionally talented child is not easy. Whose fault is it? Nobody knows. Nobody chooses how his /her children are. Children are expected to be how parents would like them to be. But they are not. If your child had not been a genius, you would not have had to cope with the problem. To some extent, you need to accept the problem in order to face it. The majority of parents need to see a specialist. The sooner, the better. Secondly, according to the prestigious psychologist A.R., one gifted child looks like quadruplets. It is exhausting. In his opinion, the most important thing is to find the root causes of the problem in order to tackle it. It is not only a personal problem, but it is also an economic one. The challenge is so huge that life changes forever. The only way to cope with it is to divide the challenge into manageable tasks, and value the progress. A.R. always says: "Never give up. Remember that your gifted child is a child". Finally, if you look up some information, you will find out that money is important in this issue. There are scholarship programs and many foundations that are interested in supporting the development of talent of these students. You cannot ruin yourself financially. There are some grants to go to events and travel. In addition, you can seek out support and social group for both your child and you. These groups can give advice in order to act in a rational way. There is no harm in promoting children and stimulating the gift, but you should not be overprotective. If you do that, your child would occupy an ivory tower, isolated from other parts of society.
You ’d better use local resources because it is cheaper and easier. By doing that, you can have a schedule to balance special and ordinary activities, in order to save time and money and try to deal a normal life. Doing exercise, playing with other children, and definitely, enjoying small things, which are the biggest. These are the best medicine to face the problem. Each stage in life is important to develop body and mind. Be aware of children's relationship could be missed while doing those weird activities that made him be a genius. Socialization is much more important. Remember that the older children get, the more problems there will be. To sum up, parents don't want their children to be a genius because it triggers problems and it is expensive, as well. But the most difficult problem that the majority of parents have is that they do not accept their children like they are. It is why they need to ask for help. If I had to choose, I would rather not have a genius at home. And what happens if he is? Nothing.I would try to struggle to educate him in a healthy way and enjoy every second in our life. Life is short, so every second is important.
Well, despite the fact of not being a mother yet, I work with children and I'm able to notice who has a posible gift. Sometimes, if the child belong to a deprived family, the talent never grows because of the lack of interest from the parents, and that is a really shame. In my opinion, you don't need a big amount of money to help your sons to develope their ability. As the article says, you only need to contact with the propper people to help you, but you have to want to... On the other hand, there are children that are born on a wealthy family having all the facilities around. In this situation, they could miss the interest because of the pressure from their parents, or become such an arrogant child that the real gift ends disappearing. Actually, the most important thing for me it's to rely on our children and give them the neccesary self-esteem to reach their dreams through their effort and our support. If they are genious, they are going to be with or without money sooner or later. Maybe that is an utopy, but I like to think that way.
Although apparently there is not scientific agreement, intellectual giftedness is usually diagnosed in those individuals that are able to score over 130 point in a standardized IQ test. To undergo a test composed of a series of logical questions maybe would not be a reliable tool to assess the real intelligence of a person, but up to date, IQ tests are the most accurate method to classify children’s intellectual abilities. Nevertheless, they have the downside of not considering physical capabilities.
Genetics allegedly plays an important role in the appearance of intellectual giftedness, but we must take into account that genetics is not only conditioned by the genome of the individual, but also by the environment in which the individual develops. In this sense, the number of opportunities that parents can offer to their offspring is highly influenced by the area where they reside, family’s socioeconomic status, the number of children… among other factors. For instance, music schools, language academies, etc., tend to be located downtown, so we can infer that the assistance to music, language or dance lessons is hampered if children live in rural areas. For example, in some autonomous communities, like Madrid, Barcelona and Seville, it is possible for kids to attend Chinese lessons, with the aim of boosting job opportunities in a future. Is it possible in minor ones?
Back to the issue, Spanish Education Law (the controversial LOMCE) encourages the establishment of guidelines for the academic training of gifted students, in order to optimize their school performance. However, it is also true that all the responsibility entailing gifted education relies on impoverished public institutions, so it is understandable that parents with gifted children would seek help in private schools, with the subsequent increase in tuitions, and the appearance of dread economic difficulties for many of them. Should our politicians improve these measures to ensure the detection of gifted children? It is almost certain that their talent could help to improve the economy of the country, but what can we hope from our Government, who doesn’t even have a Science Department?
Before finish I would like to give you a link to a test from Mensa, the high IQ society, so you can take it if you feel curious about knowing if you are one of those who would score at the 98th percentile on an IQ test: https://www.mensa.es/test/test.html
On the occasion of the end of this first school quarter , parents are strongly excited about our children's report card. However what would our reaction be if the outcomes overcame our expectations? Just imagine! Your son is likely to be an exceptionally gifted pupil. At the begining, I suppose you will be invaded by a wide range of positive feelings: the more he excels the better you feel. Nevertheless , how would your kid feel?. As the article says: ' remember that your gifted child is a child'. This is the key of the question. As far as I'm concerned, If I had been able to choose between a hightly talented kid or not, I would have chosen a non-gifted child. Whatever peculiarity that makes a huge difference between your child and the rest of his/her classmates might determine seriously his future personality and, consequently it would affect in a negative way his self-esteem. In theory, the fact of discovering that your son is a highly gifted ,would require not only learning how to face this new and unknowable world but also obtaining funds so that you could maintain this high-priced ability. As the article argues, a lot of financial resources are necessary in order to support his talented skill. In my opinion, It depends on the capacity which your son excels in, though. In this way, as it seems to be the major worry for Alina (mother of Gregory), it has deeply surprised me. If I were her, I would be more concerned about the problems that could came up related to the relationships with his peers. It must not be easy for a gifted person to feel comfortable in a society with absence of experience in this field, especially if we talk about a child. For all these reasons, here you are my conclusion and, at the same time the title of my writing: 'Better a failed subjet now and again'.
If I were a child, I would not like to be a genious. Firstly, in my opinion most children who have a gift, cannot enjoy their childhood properly. Due to the fact that they do not show interest in the same kind of things that could be normally for children of the same age group when it comes to hobbies, for instance. So they are bound to feel that have been discriminated. I work in a kindergarten and I have had the opportunity to see how these children hardly ever socialize with their schoolmates and for that reason they look unhappy. Moreover, our school system is not prepared to attend to the needs of these children. Therefore, their parents are more likely to spend much money in private education. However, nowadays, a lot of people are so gluttering because of crisis and these kids won’t able to develop totally their skills. And as it is known, the better your education is, the greater your opportunities will be. All things considered, I think there are much more pros than cons when it comes to be a small genious.
It is widely known that nowadays many parents dream of having gifted children rather than common. But we have to take into account that not every child can be prodigious. This commentary will intent to shed light on this question. First of all, parents must be aware of their function. Not only education is to teach about life and what is or is not correct, but also is to help children to look for what they really want to be happy. There is a sharp rise in the number of parents who often sign up children to such a lot of out-of-school activities (school of music, languages...), in order to improve their intellectual capacity. Nevertheless, we have to bear in mind that first and foremost they need to make the most of childhood, playing and not worrying about being successful at all. Another point is it is certain that there are gifted children who need special attention. But I think they always must express their goals previously. In this way, parents will involve themselves in it provided that their child wants. However, to make a special effort not always is possible and some people cannot afford special education. For this reason, in this situation parents ought to balance of payments, and make up their minds what can be cut down on. Although, it is known that governments tend to provide scholarships for this kind of children. To sum up, I would conclude that these days, parents should play down the importance of not having those gifted children who everybody wish. But it is important to point out that some children need special attention related to their mental capacity and parents are bound to realise it.
Is it easy to be a child prodigy in our society? As for as I have read and I know, it seems to be a big inconvenient. Not only these children do not find enough support in institutions and their parents invest all their savings, but also they do not enjoy their childhood. The gifted children are usually bullied at school and they are sentenced to drop out school in the near future. In most cases, they end up wasting their time and, what is more, they become frustrated and show emotional problems as a direct consequence of their lack of success. But unfortunately, some parent are more worried in getting money that in growing their sons properly. The richer the parents are, the unhappier their children feel. On the other hand, children who are likely to succeed could well be an asset for the society, but always taking into account that they should not be treated as merely adults. From my point of view, these children should be protected by the State and it should also guarantee them their rights. To be honest, if i were mother of a child prodigy, I would encourage him to achieve their aims without pushing him to be famous, though. It is totally the key.
All we parents want to discover a especial talent in our children and we often observe them thoroughly in order to it. We parents also compares our child to another frequently.
Sometimes it's true that a child is exceptional. In this case, as it's said in the article (and I can't agree more), parents must keep the head on the shoulders and look for profesional help. I also agree that, obviously, a talented child needs your emotional and economical support in order to develop his/her skills. Nevertheless, the more important thing you can give him/her is your love because they are especial children and making friends can be a bit hard for them.
But most times , parents realize their child's skills are not so different to others' ones and they get a bit frustrated since their gifted child doesn't live up to their expectations. Parents shouldn't have that feelings because, in some way, all children are good at something. The difficult issue is to find out this talent and encourage your child to develop it but without pressing him/her too much . Of course, it's easier said than done.
To sum up: We should be proud of our children and, actually, I know we are but maybe not as much as we should be.
You may think that having a genius child is a big advantage because, in the future, he/she will get great marks at university and will earn big amounts of money. But, in all honesty, I think we need to reflect on this topic to try to shed some light on it, because there are also some downsides.
First and foremost, in case we have a gifted child, we always have to keep in mind that he's/she's simply a child, which means that we shouldn't treat him/her differently. The main problem with gifted children is that they're often rejected by society and it's very hard for them to have a "normal" life because they don't have actual friends, which makes them unable to socialize. This is an important issue and parents should interfere to prevent it from happening.
Moreover, if your child is, for instance, a violin virtuoso, then you will have to buy him/her that instrument and all the necessary musical materials, which aren't cheap, by the way. Not to mention all the money you will have to spend to hire coaches for private lessons, or the cost of tickets to attend violin concerts celebrated outside your town (and, sometimes, even outside your country), which makes it much more expensive. If you can't afford to pay for all that, then this becomes a big complication for your child. And, with the financial crisis we're going through, it's even more difficult for the families because they usually have low budgets for this kind of activities.
Finally, I think parents shouldn't push their gifted children so much to try to make them profitable. This is, when you put your child on the public stage, they become more and more competitive, which isn't a good sign at that age. Let's not forget, as said before, that they're just children who should live their life to the fullest before it's too late. Every second counts, so parents shouldn't act so selfishly. Just leave your children alone and let them play and have fun, or they will regret it when they're older.
To conclude, therefore, in my opinion, being a genius child isn't as amazing as it may seem, but, as parents, we should support and encourage them to reach their goals without forcing them to do the things they don't want to do. This way we could help him have the life they truly deserve.
After reading the article I wonder what I would do if I had a gifted child. According to psychologists, children's earliest life is very important and influences a lot on their future when they are adults. Children have to play with other children in order to develop their imagination and social skills. They should grow up without having neither traumas nor complexes, they should learn to make friends as well as all values to be able to live in society and also to be emotionally in control so that they can take decisions in the future and be the owner of their lives. To my mind, parents should be worried about the downside aspects of their children's personality instead of invest money to develop the skill about the child is gifted. From my point of view some parents whose children are talented, think about it more as a good business than wish the best for the happiness of their children. An example to show what I mean could well be the Spanish famous tennis player Arancha Sánchez Vicario. She doesn't get on well with her parents and blames them for making a profit from her career as a tennis player. She only played tennis while her father managed her money . Now she is going bankrupt because she has had to pay a big fine to The Treasury, as a result she has taken her parents to court. In addition, all of us know about young singers or actors who, despite being famous and very rich, have endep up addicted to drugs or alcohol because they haven't know how deal with their success. All things considered, if I had a gifted child I wouldn't spoil his or her childhood, and even their whole lives, by focusing exclusively on his or her gifted skill.
Before starting to comment about the subject, I would like to raise a couple os issues to show how important is being able to walk in the other person's shoes. For instance, have you ever considered if would you like having a gifted child? And another question, if you were a gifted child, how would you feel? I shall try to respond.
On the one hand,according to the article, I have to consider that parenting a gifted child could be a great challenge in your life, in fact, it will change your life immediately and permanently. First and foremost, parents do not know what to do, they feel bewildered or disoriented. They have to face the challenge of educate and undertand to his special child that needs special education, a extra budget and emotional support and understanding in many cases. Most parents suffer because of lack of knowledges about the issue or even for lack of resources, not only human but also economic. In fact, it could be worst if you live in a town or quite far from the city. But, what is more, nowadays, in Spain, and specially after the economic crisis, the local resources are deficient; the Educational System has suffered a incomprehensible cutback. Therefore, the scenary is not encouraging not only for parents but also for children. It is essential give parents the neccesary support both human and economic, but the less resources you have, the harder will be to dealing with it .Although all of that does not mean that many of them can not obviously be happy.
On the other hand, the role that a gifted child have to play in our society will not be easy in many cases. Firstly, family is essential, both for stimulate or support their capacities and for avoid they feel frustrated or isolated for being different from other children. In addition to this, they could suffer an lack of self-steem. It has been proven that some gifted children tend to dissimulate their intelligence since they wish being normals, because normal children are much more happier than them. Secondly, regarding the normative at schools, this allows teachers several adaptations to deal with Gifted children, but as I have already mentioned, they not only need academic support but also social support. Gifted children tend to get bored, because they need challenges, so if we are not capable of offer them solutions, they might feel frustated easily. In some cases, they also are victim of bullying, consequently, this may cause a serious problem. Therefore, being a gifted child it is not a easy task and at some point, you're probably going to feel confused, bizarre or unfortunately, unhappy.
To sum up, and turning to the questions raised above, as far as I am concerned, if I had to choose between having a gifted child or not, I would probably say no, because nowadays,and specially in Spain, is too difficult due to lack of resources. And, in relation to being a gifted, it is demostrated that gifted children can feel frustated, isolated and misundestood in many case too. Therefore, they have to dealing with a vast number of problems. To finish, if I had to face with a gifted child, as a mother, I would pluck up the courage and would do my best to support and help my child as far as possible, in order to offer him the most confortable and happier life.
After reading this interesting article, I would like to highlight some ideas I agree.
To start with, we should focus on the age children have. They aren´t real workers yet. For this reason, the professional side, the academic side ot their life doesn´t occupy the main position in this stage. The health, the social development, the family relationships or the leisure activities can present a higher weight in the childhood.
Secondly, the importance of the brothers/sisters in this issue looks significant. To risk the material goods, the family economy, or even the quantity of time dedicated to each son (the most important for children I think) in order to follow an impulse doesn´t seem to me a very reasonable decision. In these cases, thinking in the long run could be more enlightening.
On the other hand, we can discuss about several questions: - What´s the point of being a genius child? - What are you really looking for? - Are you thinking tha fame and the glory will give you the happiness? - Would you be able to deal with people more talented than you? - Which option do you prefer: having a pleasant existence or going down in history as one of greater icons of the mankind? (Probably, the two options are incompatible)
In spite of the fact that we could spend days and days philosophising about this, I would like to sum up my view supporting one of the possibilities the author explains: "Cultivate (his/her talent) on a small scale". In this way, the child could grow up without radical changes, take care of the other aspects of the person, to be in touch with relatives/friends and, at the same time, take advantage of his/her special habilities.
From my point of view, it is a problem to be a genius child for two reasons: ordinary children laugh at him and they don´t meet up with him; and children who have high IQ are usually bored in the classroom. On the whole, children that are very intelligent don´t meet up with others children now that they fancy using their intelligence in order to do activities like studying others subjects (Chemistry, Math, Physics) or playing a musical instrument; or simply, they don´t succeed to make friends because ordinary children see them as “strangers”. I would like to highlight these smart children aren´t sociable, I mean it is so hard for them meeting new people since they fear what people think of. Normally, they are really quiet and shy. Secondly, parents who have exceptionally gifted children are very proud of them but in general, those parents aren´t conscious that their sons or daughters could suffer from school discrimination owing to their mental skills. When those children are discriminated, they feel quite miserable but they aren´t capable of defending themselves or looking for someone who protects them. Finally, they tend to be bored in the classroom. It seems to them that lessons are so boring that they fail all the exams. So, their parents have to search for a school for genius children. It appears to me that those schools are expensive and limited in Spain. To sum up, having a genius child is complicated because you have to bring them up to have friends and allow doing their intellectual activities at the same time.
** IF YOUR CHILD IS NOT A GENIUS, REJOICE **
ResponderEliminarIt is well known how the high scores in the IQ test usually implies a superior verbal ability above other people. Nowadays, this sort of well-gifted people aren't very common. However, it is also true that those getting high marks in questionnaires, could even get to fail to build furniture from IKEA. So, Should they be deemed as gifted, or intelligent instead?.
Firstly, when it comes to read newspapers, I usually feel the irrepressible desire of putting them to the test to unveil their utterly superior intelligence at early ages. Objectively, I challenge them to write long texts as a sign of validation of their highly creative imagination, without realising I am pushing them to fulfil tricky goals. Obviously, under such a high pressure, they are bound to lack persuasiveness, empathy, resilience or social charm.
In addition to that, if I were one of those well-off parents, I would also boast about sending my children to the very best school I could afford, dazzling my friends and triggering an exhilarating ego trip in me.
However, on second thought, my kids could be mummy and daddy deprived, as I would be supposed to work really hard around the clock to pay for school fees. Apart from that, I may lose insight about the fact that my kids would be raised by nannies.
Having said that, there seems to be no point in publicly unearthing the alleged greatness in my children's brains. I mean, it is worth to wonder whether they are really average bystanders, eager to scream the Sponge Bob Square Pants' catchy refrain, rather than recite flawlessly the whole alphabet or count to twenty. Therefore, it would be better off choosing a slightly worse school and be much better parents. For example, take out the mickey and teach them to enjoy with everyday adventures.
To conclude, accept your offsprings as they are, without caring about what they are expected to achieve, read comics with them and play games, no matter whether they are late to read or to do their shoelaces, what, depicts the cornerstone of their future happiness.
** WHY DO I FEEL SO DIFFERENT? **
ResponderEliminarSince I was a child, I have always had the nagging sense of being quite different to other people, a bit weird. For instance, I didn't fit well in school because I used to think far more deeply about issues, than other pupils, seeking answers about why things happened. Furthermore, I hardly ever have accepted criticism from others, due to my natural competitiveness.
When it comes to quick shows, I have always been rather fast, answering tough questions, than those ones playing at the show.
Nevertheless, I have never stopped to wonder why that happens. What is more, I have never cared about it.
One morning, I started reading a gripping book entitled: “Diagnosis for your son's ailments: adolescence”. As I was reading, I couldn't believe my eyes. My behaviour was mirroring in those pages. I had definitely found a label that closely fits me: I am a gifted guy!.
According to the author, my underachievement stemmed from my compulsive obsession for being overwhelmingly perfectionist when I´m doing things. Moreover, I had high capacity for doing many tasks at the same time, along with an irrepressible laziness when I was about to work, maybe due to the lack of challenging and interesting works to face to, at school.
Doubtlessly, I had found the reason for my awkward conduct.
To my relief, I am not an alien. I am just an extremely intelligent guy who has always gone simply undercover. I mean, I have always let my abilities go to a grass root level to disguise my giftedness, so as to be accepted in society. I have also tried to avoid being regarded as a hermit by my counterparts, suffering jokes gladly, without appearing too much touchy.
Having said that, I don't want you to take things the wrong way, I am not drawing a bleak portrait of my childhood. No way. On the contrary, I'm merely telling you how I have felt along my life.
However, and to conclude, it is worth to wonder why it is so difficult, for authorities, to discover gifted children and attend them in a different way, educationally speaking, before they to shut down. I mean, a way that doesn't leave so many psychological scars on them, preventing them from having to play a role of someone who they have never been.
Have you ever read in the paper or heard on the news something like this?
ResponderEliminar"We got married and my daughter was born. She was breathtakingly beautiful. We felt exhilarated, absolutely delighted. After four years, my son arrived. Seemingly, everything was perfect... life was a dream....but...something made us wake up.
What was happening? My son seemed to have special abilities, such as music, maths, computers and stuff like that. Actually, he was really good at music. He was able to hum music before starting to talk, when he was a baby. Moreover, he had a good head for figures. He was capable to do complex calculations at the age of 4. We suspected that he was exceptionally gifted. First, I was very proud of him and I thought that he would make a difference in our lives, but, in short, we realized that it could become a serious problem. In fact, the most rewarding experience turned out the be our worst nightmare.
He started to be very competitive. He was really keen on maths and geometry. He used to do complex calculations all the time, and, when he was 6, he would spend long hours developing their activities and, as consequence, it triggered an obsession. He started to act improperly. It was difficult to keep up with the others at school. In addition, he was obsessed with taking part in competitions and events, which was very expensive. It was having an effect on the development. To make things worse, he ended up missing his friends. I was really worried, since a lack of social bonds is unhealthy".
.....
ResponderEliminarFirst and foremost, realizing that your child seems to be a genius makes you feel overwhelmed, unable to react. Parents feel absolutely desperate. Some of them come close to having a nervous breakdown. Unexpectedly, the world falls apart. Your dreams disappear. You used to show off to your colleagues and friends that your child had special abilities, but now, you do not know whether you feel proud of him or not. Accepting your exceptionally talented child is not easy. Whose fault is it? Nobody knows. Nobody chooses how his /her children are. Children are expected to be how parents would like them to be. But they are not. If your child had not been a genius, you would not have had to cope with the problem. To some extent, you need to accept the problem in order to face it. The majority of parents need to see a specialist. The sooner, the better.
Secondly, according to the prestigious psychologist A.R., one gifted child looks like quadruplets. It is exhausting. In his opinion, the most important thing is to find the root causes of the problem in order to tackle it. It is not only a personal problem, but it is also an economic one. The challenge is so huge that life changes forever. The only way to cope with it is to divide the challenge into manageable tasks, and value the progress. A.R. always says: "Never give up. Remember that your gifted child is a child".
Finally, if you look up some information, you will find out that money is important in this issue. There are scholarship programs and many foundations that are interested in supporting the development of talent of these students. You cannot ruin yourself financially. There are some grants to go to events and travel. In addition, you can seek out support and social group for both your child and you. These groups can give advice in order to act in a rational way. There is no harm in promoting children and stimulating the gift, but you should not be overprotective. If you do that, your child would occupy an ivory tower, isolated from other parts of society.
You ’d better use local resources because it is cheaper and easier. By doing that, you can have a schedule to balance special and ordinary activities, in order to save time and money and try to deal a normal life. Doing exercise, playing with other children, and definitely, enjoying small things, which are the biggest. These are the best medicine to face the problem. Each stage in life is important to develop body and mind. Be aware of children's relationship could be missed while doing those weird activities that made him be a genius. Socialization is much more important.
Remember that the older children get, the more problems there will be.
To sum up, parents don't want their children to be a genius because it triggers problems and it is expensive, as well. But the most difficult problem that the majority of parents have is that they do not accept their children like they are. It is why they need to ask for help. If I had to choose, I would rather not have a genius at home. And what happens if he is? Nothing.I would try to struggle to educate him in a healthy way and enjoy every second in our life. Life is short, so every second is important.
Well, despite the fact of not being a mother yet, I work with children and I'm able to notice who has a posible gift.
ResponderEliminarSometimes, if the child belong to a deprived family, the talent never grows because of the lack of interest from the parents, and that is a really shame.
In my opinion, you don't need a big amount of money to help your sons to develope their ability. As the article says, you only need to contact with the propper people to help you, but you have to want to...
On the other hand, there are children that are born on a wealthy family having all the facilities around. In this situation, they could miss the interest because of the pressure from their parents, or become such an arrogant child that the real gift ends disappearing.
Actually, the most important thing for me it's to rely on our children and give them the neccesary self-esteem to reach their dreams through their effort and our support. If they are genious, they are going to be with or without money sooner or later. Maybe that is an utopy, but I like to think that way.
Although apparently there is not scientific agreement, intellectual giftedness is usually diagnosed in those individuals that are able to score over 130 point in a standardized IQ test. To undergo a test composed of a series of logical questions maybe would not be a reliable tool to assess the real intelligence of a person, but up to date, IQ tests are the most accurate method to classify children’s intellectual abilities. Nevertheless, they have the downside of not considering physical capabilities.
ResponderEliminarGenetics allegedly plays an important role in the appearance of intellectual giftedness, but we must take into account that genetics is not only conditioned by the genome of the individual, but also by the environment in which the individual develops. In this sense, the number of opportunities that parents can offer to their offspring is highly influenced by the area where they reside, family’s socioeconomic status, the number of children… among other factors. For instance, music schools, language academies, etc., tend to be located downtown, so we can infer that the assistance to music, language or dance lessons is hampered if children live in rural areas. For example, in some autonomous communities, like Madrid, Barcelona and Seville, it is possible for kids to attend Chinese lessons, with the aim of boosting job opportunities in a future. Is it possible in minor ones?
Back to the issue, Spanish Education Law (the controversial LOMCE) encourages the establishment of guidelines for the academic training of gifted students, in order to optimize their school performance. However, it is also true that all the responsibility entailing gifted education relies on impoverished public institutions, so it is understandable that parents with gifted children would seek help in private schools, with the subsequent increase in tuitions, and the appearance of dread economic difficulties for many of them. Should our politicians improve these measures to ensure the detection of gifted children? It is almost certain that their talent could help to improve the economy of the country, but what can we hope from our Government, who doesn’t even have a Science Department?
Before finish I would like to give you a link to a test from Mensa, the high IQ society, so you can take it if you feel curious about knowing if you are one of those who would score at the 98th percentile on an IQ test: https://www.mensa.es/test/test.html
Good luck!
On the occasion of the end of this first school quarter , parents are strongly excited about our children's report card. However what would our reaction be if the outcomes overcame our expectations?
ResponderEliminarJust imagine! Your son is likely to be an exceptionally gifted pupil. At the begining, I suppose you will be invaded by a wide range of positive feelings: the more he excels the better you feel. Nevertheless , how would your kid feel?. As the article says: ' remember that your gifted child is a child'. This is the key of the question.
As far as I'm concerned, If I had been able to choose between a hightly talented kid or not, I would have chosen a non-gifted child. Whatever peculiarity that makes a huge difference between your child and the rest of his/her classmates might determine seriously his future personality and, consequently it would affect in a negative way his self-esteem.
In theory, the fact of discovering that your son is a highly gifted ,would require not only learning how to face this new and unknowable world but also obtaining funds so that you could maintain this high-priced ability. As the article argues, a lot of financial resources are necessary in order to support his talented skill. In my opinion, It depends on the capacity which your son excels in, though.
In this way, as it seems to be the major worry for Alina (mother of Gregory), it has deeply surprised me. If I were her, I would be more concerned about the problems that could came up related to the relationships with his peers. It must not be easy for a gifted person to feel comfortable in a society with absence of experience in this field, especially if we talk about a child.
For all these reasons, here you are my conclusion and, at the same time the title of my writing: 'Better a failed subjet now and again'.
Mª José Hernández.
IS LIFE GREAT FOR CHILD GENIOUS?
ResponderEliminarIf I were a child, I would not like to be a genious.
Firstly, in my opinion most children who have a gift, cannot enjoy their childhood properly. Due to the fact that they do not show interest in the same kind of things that could be normally for children of the same age group when it comes to hobbies, for instance. So they are bound to feel that have been discriminated. I work in a kindergarten and I have had the opportunity to see how these children hardly ever socialize with their schoolmates and for that reason they look unhappy.
Moreover, our school system is not prepared to attend to the needs of these children. Therefore, their parents are more likely to spend much money in private education. However, nowadays, a lot of people are so gluttering because of crisis and these kids won’t able to develop totally their skills. And as it is known, the better your education is, the greater your opportunities will be.
All things considered, I think there are much more pros than cons when it comes to be a small genious.
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ResponderEliminarIt is widely known that nowadays many parents dream of having gifted children rather than common. But we have to take into account that not every child can be prodigious. This commentary will intent to shed light on this question.
ResponderEliminarFirst of all, parents must be aware of their function. Not only education is to teach about life and what is or is not correct, but also is to help children to look for what they really want to be happy. There is a sharp rise in the number of parents who often sign up children to such a lot of out-of-school activities (school of music, languages...), in order to improve their intellectual capacity. Nevertheless, we have to bear in mind that first and foremost they need to make the most of childhood, playing and not worrying about being successful at all.
Another point is it is certain that there are gifted children who need special attention. But I think they always must express their goals previously. In this way, parents will involve themselves in it provided that their child wants. However, to make a special effort not always is possible and some people cannot afford special education. For this reason, in this situation parents ought to balance of payments, and make up their minds what can be cut down on. Although, it is known that governments tend to provide scholarships for this kind of children.
To sum up, I would conclude that these days, parents should play down the importance of not having those gifted children who everybody wish. But it is important to point out that some children need special attention related to their mental capacity and parents are bound to realise it.
Is it easy to be a child prodigy in our society? As for as I have read and I know, it seems to be a big inconvenient. Not only these children do not find enough support in institutions and their parents invest all their savings, but also they do not enjoy their childhood. The gifted children are usually bullied at school and they are sentenced to drop out school in the near future.
ResponderEliminarIn most cases, they end up wasting their time and, what is more, they become frustrated and show emotional problems as a direct consequence of their lack of success. But unfortunately, some parent are more worried in getting money that in growing their sons properly. The richer the parents are, the unhappier their children feel.
On the other hand, children who are likely to succeed could well be an asset for the society, but always taking into account that they should not be treated as merely adults.
From my point of view, these children should be protected by the State and it should also guarantee them their rights.
To be honest, if i were mother of a child prodigy, I would encourage him to achieve their aims without pushing him to be famous, though. It is totally the key.
Mª Ángeles Urbano
WHO IS NOT A TALENTED CHILD?
ResponderEliminarAll we parents want to discover a especial talent in our children and we often observe them thoroughly in order to it. We parents also compares our child to another frequently.
Sometimes it's true that a child is exceptional. In this case, as it's said in the article (and I can't agree more), parents must keep the head on the shoulders and look for profesional help.
I also agree that, obviously, a talented child needs your emotional and economical support in order to develop his/her skills. Nevertheless, the more important thing you can give him/her is your love because they are especial children and making friends can be a bit hard for them.
But most times , parents realize their child's skills are not so different to others' ones and they get a bit frustrated since their gifted child doesn't live up to their expectations. Parents shouldn't have that feelings because, in some way, all children are good at something. The difficult issue is to find out this talent and encourage your child to develop it but without pressing him/her too much . Of course, it's easier said than done.
To sum up: We should be proud of our children and, actually, I know we are but maybe not as much as we should be.
Carmen Tripiana
You may think that having a genius child is a big advantage because, in the future, he/she will get great marks at university and will earn big amounts of money. But, in all honesty, I think we need to reflect on this topic to try to shed some light on it, because there are also some downsides.
ResponderEliminarFirst and foremost, in case we have a gifted child, we always have to keep in mind that he's/she's simply a child, which means that we shouldn't treat him/her differently. The main problem with gifted children is that they're often rejected by society and it's very hard for them to have a "normal" life because they don't have actual friends, which makes them unable to socialize. This is an important issue and parents should interfere to prevent it from happening.
Moreover, if your child is, for instance, a violin virtuoso, then you will have to buy him/her that instrument and all the necessary musical materials, which aren't cheap, by the way. Not to mention all the money you will have to spend to hire coaches for private lessons, or the cost of tickets to attend violin concerts celebrated outside your town (and, sometimes, even outside your country), which makes it much more expensive. If you can't afford to pay for all that, then this becomes a big complication for your child. And, with the financial crisis we're going through, it's even more difficult for the families because they usually have low budgets for this kind of activities.
Finally, I think parents shouldn't push their gifted children so much to try to make them profitable. This is, when you put your child on the public stage, they become more and more competitive, which isn't a good sign at that age. Let's not forget, as said before, that they're just children who should live their life to the fullest before it's too late. Every second counts, so parents shouldn't act so selfishly. Just leave your children alone and let them play and have fun, or they will regret it when they're older.
To conclude, therefore, in my opinion, being a genius child isn't as amazing as it may seem, but, as parents, we should support and encourage them to reach their goals without forcing them to do the things they don't want to do. This way we could help him have the life they truly deserve.
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ResponderEliminarAfter reading the article I wonder what I would do if I had a gifted child.
ResponderEliminarAccording to psychologists, children's earliest life is very important and influences a lot on their future when they are adults. Children have to play with other children in order to develop their imagination and social skills. They should grow up without having neither traumas nor complexes, they should learn to make friends as well as all values to be able to live in society and also to be emotionally in control so that they can take decisions in the future and be the owner of their lives.
To my mind, parents should be worried about the downside aspects of their children's personality instead of invest money to develop the skill about the child is gifted.
From my point of view some parents whose children are talented, think about it more as a good business than wish the best for the happiness of their children. An example to show what I mean could well be the Spanish famous tennis player Arancha Sánchez Vicario. She doesn't get on well with her parents and blames them for making a profit from her career as a tennis player. She only played tennis while her father managed her money . Now she is going bankrupt because she has had to pay a big fine to The Treasury, as a result she has taken her parents to court.
In addition, all of us know about young singers or actors who, despite being famous and very rich, have endep up addicted to drugs or alcohol because they haven't know how deal with their success.
All things considered, if I had a gifted child I wouldn't spoil his or her childhood, and even their whole lives, by focusing exclusively on his or her gifted skill.
Mª Leonor Sánchez
Before starting to comment about the subject, I would like to raise a couple os issues to show how important is being able to walk in the other person's shoes. For instance, have you ever considered if would you like having a gifted child? And another question, if you were a gifted child, how would you feel? I shall try to respond.
ResponderEliminarOn the one hand,according to the article, I have to consider that parenting a gifted child could be a great challenge in your life, in fact, it will change your life immediately and permanently. First and foremost, parents do not know what to do, they feel bewildered or disoriented. They have to face the challenge of educate and undertand to his special child that needs special education, a extra budget and emotional support and understanding in many cases. Most parents suffer because of lack of knowledges about the issue or even for lack of resources, not only human but also economic. In fact, it could be worst if you live in a town or quite far from the city. But, what is more, nowadays, in Spain, and specially after the economic crisis, the local resources are deficient; the Educational System has suffered a incomprehensible cutback. Therefore, the scenary is not encouraging not only for parents but also for children. It is essential give parents the neccesary support both human and economic, but the less resources you have, the harder will be to dealing with it .Although all of that does not mean that many of them can not obviously be happy.
On the other hand, the role that a gifted child have to play in our society will not be easy in many cases. Firstly, family is essential, both for stimulate or support their capacities and for avoid they feel frustrated or isolated for being different from other children. In addition to this, they could suffer an lack of self-steem. It has been proven that some gifted children tend to dissimulate their intelligence since they wish being normals, because normal children are much more happier than them. Secondly, regarding the normative at schools, this allows teachers several adaptations to deal with Gifted children, but as I have already mentioned, they not only need academic support but also social support. Gifted children tend to get bored, because they need challenges, so if we are not capable of offer them solutions, they might feel frustated easily. In some cases, they also are victim of bullying, consequently, this may cause a serious problem. Therefore, being a gifted child it is not a easy task and at some point, you're probably going to feel confused, bizarre or unfortunately, unhappy.
To sum up, and turning to the questions raised above, as far as I am concerned, if I had to choose between having a gifted child or not, I would probably say no, because nowadays,and specially in Spain, is too difficult due to lack of resources. And, in relation to being a gifted, it is demostrated that gifted children can feel frustated, isolated and misundestood in many case too. Therefore, they have to dealing with a vast number of problems. To finish, if I had to face with a gifted child, as a mother, I would pluck up the courage and would do my best to support and help my child as far as possible, in order to offer him the most confortable and happier life.
Elena Zamora L.
After reading this interesting article, I would like to highlight some ideas I agree.
ResponderEliminarTo start with, we should focus on the age children have. They aren´t real workers yet. For this reason, the professional side, the academic side ot their life doesn´t occupy the main position in this stage. The health, the social development, the family relationships or the leisure activities can present a higher weight in the childhood.
Secondly, the importance of the brothers/sisters in this issue looks significant. To risk the material goods, the family economy, or even the quantity of time dedicated to each son (the most important for children I think) in order to follow an impulse doesn´t seem to me a very reasonable decision. In these cases, thinking in the long run could be more enlightening.
On the other hand, we can discuss about several questions:
- What´s the point of being a genius child?
- What are you really looking for?
- Are you thinking tha fame and the glory will give you the happiness?
- Would you be able to deal with people more talented than you?
- Which option do you prefer: having a pleasant existence or going down in history as one of greater icons of the mankind?
(Probably, the two options are incompatible)
In spite of the fact that we could spend days and days philosophising about this, I would like to sum up my view supporting one of the possibilities the author explains: "Cultivate (his/her talent) on a small scale". In this way, the child could grow up without radical changes, take care of the other aspects of the person, to be in touch with relatives/friends and, at the same time, take advantage of his/her special habilities.
From my point of view, it is a problem to be a genius child for two reasons: ordinary children laugh at him and they don´t meet up with him; and children who have high IQ are usually bored in the classroom.
ResponderEliminarOn the whole, children that are very intelligent don´t meet up with others children now that they fancy using their intelligence in order to do activities like studying others subjects (Chemistry, Math, Physics) or playing a musical instrument; or simply, they don´t succeed to make friends because ordinary children see them as “strangers”. I would like to highlight these smart children aren´t sociable, I mean it is so hard for them meeting new people since they fear what people think of. Normally, they are really quiet and shy.
Secondly, parents who have exceptionally gifted children are very proud of them but in general, those parents aren´t conscious that their sons or daughters could suffer from school discrimination owing to their mental skills. When those children are discriminated, they feel quite miserable but they aren´t capable of defending themselves or looking for someone who protects them.
Finally, they tend to be bored in the classroom. It seems to them that lessons are so boring that they fail all the exams. So, their parents have to search for a school for genius children. It appears to me that those schools are expensive and limited in Spain.
To sum up, having a genius child is complicated because you have to bring them up to have friends and allow doing their intellectual activities at the same time.